Telengana: The cycle repeats..

Quite often, we have heard about or rather studied about the evolution of mankind in history - About the Incas, Mayans, Aryans etc. We have also studied about continental drift in Geography.

Both these point to one thing: There was one community called "Homosapiens" aka "human beings" in the beginning. They ate, slept, fought, bathed together for centuries. Then, owing to fight over women, men & children, they split into groups and became Incas, Aryans , Mayans etc.. some of them again split into Asians and Europeans. Some of them again split into Indians and Chinese. Again they split into Misras, Jhas and Iyers...Some of them again split into CEOs and Labor-class; split again into Biz-class & economy class fliers, split into homosexuals, bisexuals and straights..and so on! While these splits happened on one side, the continents, inspired by the homosapiens, also started separating these groups physically. Mother Europe decided to move towards the pole as she is used to a cold climate and couldn't endure an equator temperature, Mother Australia wanted more privacy and moved to another corner - maintaing distance from everyone, yet dating Japan and New Zealand; China, as she is now, was angry with India and gave her a sudden bump and there formed the Himalayas. Africa broke up with the Latin America and gave way to Bermuda, the empty heart. (Or the empty hole :)

So, going by the above patterns, some options for Telangana's are as follows:

1) Create a man made canal (like Panama, Suez) in between Andra Pradesh and make an island out of Telangana. This can give them a country status in sometime (like Sri Lanka). And of course freedom to form many many states within that country (what a fortune!). You can also have a separate Cricket team and compete for higher TRPs than the India-Pak matches.

2) If not satisfied, Move the newly formed island a few miles southward and may be you'll get a continent or atleast a sub-continent status. Imagine a new ocean named after you : Ocean of Telangana.

3) If still not satisfied and you want to follow your Telugu heart's true calling, then keep moving the island eastwards, but be sure to budge Australia, and you will end up in California one day. Bump hard into CA, you can form your mountains, greenery and become a state of the US too.

4) Once you are in US, you can call all your AP brothers settled in US to the newly formed state - TA (Telangana). And aspire to have a TA-ian as the US president some day.

What others can learn from TAs:

1) Kerala should follow the same strategy and merge with UAE. Or vice versa. Why waste so much time in travelling and transferring money/gold to NRE accounts?

2) All Harley Davidson fans across the world should form a separate country. So that they dont have to orgaize cross country races anymore.

3) Bombay should have separate Bihar and UP suburbs & stations. So their address would have landmarks like: Linking Road, Bihar (west), Mumbai - 11

4) Goa should be merged with Pattaya on the lines of similar Ideology. Phew. I can do it in just 2000 bucks!

5) River Kaveri should have a new stop at Telangana also. Stopping at AP and not at TA can be disastrous. Similarly another important turn out would be the request for a new IIT at TA.

6) Nandan Nilekani should have provisions for accommodating atleast 999 states in India inorder to be sustainable in his UID solutions. And if required options to hive off countries. If & when 999 is exceeded, he can also give IT projects for Infosys called Y1K.

7) All MNCs to have ERP systems with flexible options of merging and dividing states/countries.

8) CAT to ofcourse announce a set of dates for Pan-India, plan to conducts Tests in AP and by the time of re-tests, do them in AP and TA, re-re-tests in TA-1 & TA-2 if required. If the server still fails, the students may go for hunger strikes.

9) AP competed with Maharashtra to attract FDI investments. Now suddenly AP competes with itself.

Uff.. Now you write your thoughts below in the comments: